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Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com ONLINE DATING IN 5 SIMPLE STEPS The Practical Guide to Internet Dating for Love Seekers! www.likeapub.comOnline Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com LEGAL NOTICE: The Publisher has strived to be as accurate and complete as possible in the creation of this report, notwithstanding the fact that he does not warrant or represent at any time that the contents within are accurate due to the rapidly changing nature of the Internet. While all attempts have been made to verify information provided in this publication, the Publisher assumes no responsibility for errors, omissions, or contrary interpretation of the subject matter herein. Any perceived slights of specific persons, peoples, or organizations are unintentional. In practical advice books, like anything else in life, there are no guarantees of income made. Readers are cautioned to reply on their own judgment about their individual circumstances to act accordingly. This book is not intended for use as a source of legal, business, accounting or financial advice. All readers are advised to seek services of competent professionals in legal, business, accounting, and finance field. You are encouraged to print this book for easy reading. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com TABLE OF CONTENTS What You Need to Know About Online Dating… First! .................................................... 6 Tastes Differ ................................................................................................................ 6 Reading This E-Book................................................................................................... 7 What Makes Online Dating So Different? ....................................................................... 8 The Magic of the Internet ............................................................................................. 8 How Did Online Dating Become So Popular? .............................................................. 9 Be Clear About What You Want ................................................................................ 10 Marriage Versus A Casual Relationship .................................................................... 11 Dating Comes From a Fundamental Need ................................................................ 12 Online Dating Is Here To Stay ................................................................................... 13 How To Get The Most Out Of Online Dating .............................................................. 14 Step 1: Getting Started .................................................................................................. 15 Where Do You Start? ................................................................................................ 16 More Than Looks ...................................................................................................... 16 Common Interests ..................................................................................................... 17 What Interests You In A Person?............................................................................... 18 Keyword Searches .................................................................................................... 18 Likes Versus Dislikes................................................................................................. 19 Friends First .............................................................................................................. 20 Mr. Right and Ms. Wrong ........................................................................................... 21 Step 2: Making Yourself Look Like A Million Dollars ...................................................... 22 The Dream Profile ..................................................................................................... 23 The Face In The Mirror .............................................................................................. 23 The Modesty Pitfall .................................................................................................... 24 The Braggart Pitfall .................................................................................................... 25 The Hackneyed Pitfall................................................................................................ 26 The Boredom Pitfall ................................................................................................... 27 The Web of Deceit ..................................................................................................... 28 Your Alter Ego! .......................................................................................................... 28 Brevity is Key!............................................................................................................ 29 You are Unique! ........................................................................................................ 30 The Animal Test ........................................................................................................ 30 Step 3: Letting The Relationship Blossom .................................................................... 33 Nicknames and Pet names ........................................................................................ 33Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com Helping your Memory ................................................................................................ 34 Small Talk ................................................................................................................. 35 Beware of Instant Intimacy ........................................................................................ 35 4 Ways To Tell If Someone Is Lying .......................................................................... 36 Step 4: Meeting Face To Face ...................................................................................... 38 The Rendezvous ....................................................................................................... 38 Leaving Your Mark Behind ........................................................................................ 39 Clothes Makes A Man (Or Woman) ........................................................................... 40 Footing the Bill........................................................................................................... 41 Many Dates ............................................................................................................... 41 Offline Dating: How To Make That Great Impression ................................................. 41 The Secret is Charm.................................................................................................. 42 Gifts? ......................................................................................................................... 43 Step 5: Once Bitten… .................................................................................................... 45 In Closing… .................................................................................................................. 47Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com ONLINE DATING IN 5 SIMPLE STEPS The Practical Guide to Internet Dating for Love Seekers! Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com What You Need to Know About Online Dating… First! Online dating is not all fun and games and there are a lot of things that a person has to know about online dating before one gets into the intricacies of it. Online dating may seem to be the simplest thing in the world but it is not. It should be viewed in all earnestness or things could go haywire. Every game has its rules and unless you know all the rules you just can’t become a good player and eventually a winner. Tastes Differ There are so many kinds of people around. Just look around you -- how many people you know look the same? Sizes, builds, shapes, features… they are all so different! And that is just about the external appearances. And when it comes to character, it becomes a very different story altogether. Take a trip down memory lane, go back to your classrooms and look around. A classroom is one place where we get to interact with a lot of different people on a very close basis. We get to rub shoulders and corners with very different people and we get to know them on a one to one basis. So how many of your classmates did you genuinely like? I don’t mean like them as classmates but as people. Was it easy to get along with all of them? That is why we often end up with best friends or clichés in classrooms. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com We do not and do not have to like everybody. The tastes and interests of one person might match with ours while the tastes and interests of another person may be at complete loggerheads with ours. So when it comes to dating, it is very much the same story. But over here there are some strings attached. Unlike in a classroom contact, most people go on dates with a more impressive purpose, and that is to find life mate. There are a hundred and one things that should match before two people decide to spend the rest of their lives with each other. Many people are of the opinion that they do not need any help with dating. They may be right because nobody knows a person’s tastes and likes better than the person himself or herself. Maybe most of us do not need any help in making the right choice but isn’t it good to get a few pointers on the dating process as such, particularly on Online dating? It is with this objective that this matter was prepared so that the thousands who are now availing of Internet dating may get the best out of it. Reading This E-Book I understand that most of my readers are very busy people who do not have too much time to spend reading an instruction manual. So I have come up with something that requires just a single glance to get the gist of it. At the most you might require 10-15 minutes to run your eyes along the entire length of this book. It’s that simple. But at the same time, do not let the simplicity mislead you. It is indeed a very comprehensive work that aims to leave no stones unturned. You can either use this book as a general guideline to streamline your match-hunting venture, or you can keep coming back to it to make sure of every step before you actually put your foot forward. I can promise you that if you use this book to guide you, there is no need to fear at all…you just won’t stumble. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com What Makes Online Dating So Different? We, human beings have been in this world for so many thousands of years. And since the beginning people have been choosing partners. Cultures across the world are very different and we can come across so many different ways in which people choose their life mates. But the concept of finding a life partner with the help of the Internet is a fairly recent concept when compared with the history of mankind as such. Of course the Internet and computers have influenced man’s life so much that it is no surprise that in the matters of finding a suitable partner too, the Internet has made its presence felt. Online dating is, to put is very simply or flatly, finding a partner with the help of a machine namely the computer via the Internet. That itself makes the idea and the process a very novel one indeed, Hundreds of happy people across the globe have been successful in finding suitable partners by the means of online dating. But to be frank with you, a lot of not-so-lucky persons have been goofed and jilted by the same process. So in order to make sure that you find a place in the first list let us go into the details of Online dating. The Magic of the Internet Everything that applies to the Internet, applies to Online dating as well. The Internet as we know allows for unlimited possibilities in communication, and it is this feature that has proved to be at the same time the biggest boon, as well as bane for Online dating. People can start from scratch and get to know everything about each other before the actual meeting takes place. Tastes and preferences, likes and dislikes, interests and obsessions can be discussed on a one to one basis so that when the meeting actually Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com takes place these two people are not in the least strangers to each other. Wonderful, isn’t it? But at the same time this possibility for unlimited communication leaves a lot of space for guile as well. The human race is endowed with a remarkable ability to use, misuse and abuse the same thing. And naturally, Online dating too has been and is still being used for vile purposes. The person who is misusing this facility may either be a practical joker or may be someone with more devious intentions who is out to get some victims. It is because of this reason that a little bit of homework is good before you actually hit the road. But you do not have to worry, the home work has already been painstakingly done for you and all you have to do is run your eyes along the following lines and you will be all set to strike gold. How Did Online Dating Become So Popular? The reason is pretty simple. It is very much the same reason that the Internet itself became so popular. The Internet opens up a whole new world of communication and contact. And the reasons for this are given below. • Speed Try to picture what used to happen earlier in the days when people had to depend on the good ol’ postal system. During those days, a person had to wait for one or two days for a letter to get across to a person who lived in the same state itself. The second person in turn would take one or two days to respond and this letter would take on or two days to get back to the first person. So in effect, a single correspondence would stretch over a week. But now it’s a totally different story. The time taken for the first letter and the response has been brought to an amazing 2 minutes! Waiting may make the heart grow fonder but e-mail makes two people get close faster! Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com • Privacy The Internet provides for absolute privacy too. One can carry out communication with another person in the absolute privacy of one’s bedroom or bath room or wherever one chooses to be. There is no fear of eavesdropping (ugh) or over hearing (shudder!) thanks to e-mail and chat facilities. • Options and Opportunities The Internet provides for other options like voice chat or video conferencing and stops short only of the physical touch. But then who would want to start a relationship by touching right away? You can see a person, talk to a person, and listen to the person’s voice, can you think of a better way to start a date? • Economy All this and more it is possible thanks to the Internet and the best part is that all this comes to you for peanuts. All you need is a PC (who doesn’t have one?) and an Internet Connection (how can anybody live without one?) and you are all set. The only thing more you could ask for is a step-by-step guide to find your dream date…well here it is! So what are we waiting for? Be Clear About What You Want We all know that man is a social being. However man is also a lonely being. (And when we say man, we mean women too). Man longs for company. Company not just from friends and the family, but from that special person with whom he or she can share those sweet nothings, those simple pleasures and pains, someone with Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com whom he or she can build a whole new life, someone with whom he or she can raise a family of his or her own. Now this is a fundamental need of man: to find a life mate. And the most popular method used for this is dating. When we talk about dating in the very finest sense of the word, please understand that dating is not to be viewed as a precursor for sleeping together. It is much more than that. It is the first step towards choosing a life partner and online dating has made the whole process a lot simpler now. Marriage Versus A Casual Relationship Now what you do and what you want is entirely your business. I don’t want to sound nosey but I would like to draw a fine line between the kind of dating that is involved in these two quests. Of course we are all grown up and so let us act like grown ups. Obviously in a casual relationship we are looking for fun. And mind you, fun can have a lot of connotations. So here the object of one’s desire will obviously be a person who is not inclined towards a serious relationship. If both parties are of the same view then it is well and good because they understand each other perfectly and do not expect much from such a relationship. This leaves no room for heartbreak. It is when one party is in for something more serious and the other party is into sheer frivolousness that the problems start. So you should be absolutely clear about what you are looking for from the start, and you should make your intentions very clear to the other person. At the same time you should have no doubts about the intentions of the other person as well. Remember, even if it is a casual relationship, there should be mutual understanding at least about the nature of the relationship. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com Of course, there is yet another possibility where a casual relationship can blossom into something more serious. But, again in such cases it is your instincts that can help you identify what is good and what is bad. No matter how strong a person is, anyone can be taken for a ride or be taken for granted. Being jilted is never a nice experience. So those of you who are going in for a casual relationship, for heavens sake, be on your guard! Marriage is altogether a different story but we will deal with that later. Dating Comes From a Fundamental Need Let’s face it, of course sex is important, but sex is by far NOT the most important reason for dating. Important! Maybe during the age of thoughtless youth, when new hormones are being pumped in and out, sex is on every one’s mind. But as one matures (mind you that does not mean growing old and gray) sex takes the back seat and mutual support, likes and dislikes, cooperation, caring and sharing come to the forefront. We start thinking about building up a world of our own and we need someone to share it with, and not just someone to sleep with. Sex is a fundamental need of every human being. We all have it in us to give and receive physical pleasure. But when you sit and think about it for a minute, you can see that this urge is actually the result of another urge. There is a more primary urge in every human being to breed and produce offspring, and it is this urge that gives rise to such a powerful sexual desire. But whatever be the urge, the most dignified means to satisfy it is dating. Nobody, not one of us, is complete without a partner; and it is to satisfy this need that people date. Because of this, the rest of this manual will be dedicated not to finding the right sex partner, but to finding the right life partner. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com Online Dating Is Here To Stay Let’s accept the fact that dating couldn’t really get better. Online dating is THE real thing. Let’s compare it to the old system of evening balls or social gatherings. Imagine you are this big gathering where there are a lot of men and women looking out for suitable partners. Suppose you bump into one or two people with whom you seem to strike an immediate rapport. You are then able to take this person out onto a balcony with just the moon to keep an eye on you. You get to talk to this person for hours and hours; just talk and nothing else. You get to discuss likes and dislikes then finally when it is time to part you leave with a promise to meet on a following day at an equally enjoyable spot. These talks go on for days and weeks and finally you decide that this indeed is THE person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life with. Then of course you start meeting in more open places, you hold hands and even kiss. You begin to go out for lunch and dinner and spend even more intimate time together. When the moment is right and your decision is made, it then becomes time for you to say, “I do.” Sigh! It sounds like a nice fairy tale, doesn’t it? Well it needn’t be. It could be your own love story because the concept of online dating is just what has been described above. If you click the right buttons everything could work out fine for you and we have evidence to prove it. Just take a look at the figures given below and you can behold for yourself what a universal phenomenon online dating has already become. As I mentioned earlier, one of the best things about online dating is that it affords a lot of privacy. You can chat for hours, video conference, or do whatever it is you care to do without arousing the interest of others or attracting the wrong kind of attention. All you need is a computer and Internet access everything becomes as discreet as can be. But along with that, may I add that we need a little bit of common sense as well or else we might find ourselves within the clutches of many lurid monsters lurking out there. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com Another good thing about online dating is that it saves a lot of money which otherwise you would have had to splurge each time you took someone out on a date. It is because of these reasons and many more personal reasons that thousands of people find online dating to be a great convenience. How To Get The Most Out Of Online Dating Many people who decide to give online dating a try often end up with their hair singed and fingers burnt. The reason we decided to put together such a manual is that online dating is not as simple as it looks. You need to know how to go about it in order to get the best out of it. Most people do not like to take chances and when it comes to finding a life partner people do not want to take chances at all. But you can relax for through this manual we will be dealing with all the do’s and the don’ts and so the whole process will be quite easy and enjoyable to you. This manual will provide you with step-by-step instructions on how to being online dating. We have no doubts about the decision-making abilities of our readers and so we do not propose to give a lot of advice on the issue. Our purpose is simply to provide a couple of guidelines which we hope our readers will find valuable as they proceed in the attempt to find the perfect partner. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com Step 1: Getting Started “Only fools rush in where angels fear to tread”. It is always best to approach unfamiliar territory with caution. You need to plan before you actually go out there and start dealing your cards. Be sure about yourself and be sure about what you want. Just because anyone and everyone can type out whatever they want in a chat room doesn’t mean that we have to do the same. The Internet has a wonderful quality of being accessible to every one. But this same quality attracts all kinds of people into it. But just because a lot of people who enter a chat room have only dirt on their minds, it doesn’t mean that everyone is like that. If you stick to the class that you have and maintain your poise, you can indeed get the right kind of response. There are a lot of nice people using the Internet, but it all depends on what you do. Do onto others what you want them to do to you is the golden rule that applies here. There are no rules for the game. All are players out there. But just because others are ruffians, it doesn’t mean that you have to be one too. Your approach is the only thing that can get you the kind of response that you want. I don’t think that it is very sensible to decide all of the sudden that you would like to use the Internet to get a date. By just entering a chat room and saying “I’m available” you are merely putting yourself up for sale, and will most likely not get the results you desire. One point that all of us have to understand is that in a chat room, all are equal. Do not go by the misconception that entering a chat room is like sauntering into a ball room dressed in your best. Then everyone turns to stare at you and the most eligible person (read that as the sexiest person of the opposite sex) catches your eye and makes his or her way towards you. That kind of thing happens only on James Bond movies and we all know that James Bond never goes in for a serious relationship. It’s all fun and games for him. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com Where Do You Start? The first tip we would like to give you is NOT to go straight away into a singles’ chat room and try to find somebody who would interest you. All of us know that most of such chat rooms are virtually flooded with people who have only one thing on their mind - sex. So, no matter what you ask for, it always ends up in that and the purpose is defeated. You will never get the kind of person who kind of matches your interests and tastes. Sometimes it can really get quite infuriating. Everything starts off well. You are having a nice conversation with a person and warming up when all of the sudden, the topic moves towards the three letter word. The you let out a sigh and either have to bar messages from that person and risk the person bad mouthing you in a public chat room. Usually you have to leave the chat room all together. In other words, it is the easiest thing to get someone to sleep with you but if you are looking for something more enduring, like a partner for life, then you are going to have to be a little more patient. The pick of the litter is not easy to find. But you do find it; it is going to be worth the effort. So instead of going into a singles’ chat room, what you could do is, you could try the whole thing out from a different angle. You could try working backwards. More Than Looks Sit for a minute or two and try and think about the things that interest you and things that you would find interesting in a person. By ‘things’ over here I am not referring to physical attributes. I am not referring to something that might interest you in a person’s physical appearance. Again the distinction has to be drawn between a serious relationship and a casual relationship. In a casual relationship, the importance is always for the physical attributes. We are more concerned with what the person looks like and what the person has been endowed with. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com On the other hand, if we have a serious relationship, then the physical qualities are not so important. Compatibility is probably the most important factor over here. Along with that there are certain qualities that obviously we will be looking out for. We are talking about qualities of the mind. After all, beauty is only skin-deep! This idea might sound strange, but it is actually true. The idea is that it is possible to grow to like the looks of a person. Once you find the character of the person agreeable you will start liking the person as a whole. It is entirely possible to fall in love with a person if the person does not look like a movie star. That is one of the tricks that nature plays. There are many people who insist on taking a look at the other person’s picture before actually committing to a relationship. They might have their reasons of course, but I, for one, feel that such a decision based largely on looks is more suitable for a casual relationship. It is bound to sizzle off after some time. After all, how long can you keep staring at a person? And what happens if the person doesn’t stare back at you? Or even worse, what happens if you find the person staring at another person? Looks may be important, but they certainly are not the most important thing and should never be used as the deciding factor if you are thinking about a serious relationship. Common Interests A human being is not like a piece of glass though which you can look and see the other side. A human being is more like a diamond, which when held against light reflects and deflects light so that a myriad of colors are seen. We’re complex. We have a lot of interest and the interests of one person need not match with the interests of another. But thankfully the interests are not as numerous as human beings. So we are bound to find a lot of people who share our interests. And if we can find someone like that, then our search should end there. So, what are your interests? That is something for you to find out. Mind you, you might have to do some serious thinking before you level down you preferences. There might be a lot of things that you enjoy doing but about which you have given a second thought. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com Your interests could be something like sports or outdoor activities. Or you could think of interests like social work or cross-words or religious interests. Keep the ball rolling; please understand that the words I have listed here are mere suggestions. Your tastes and interests could be very different. So let them be. And once you have decided on what your interests are then half the story is done. What Interests You In A Person? This is probably the more important part of the story. Each one of us has to sit and think about what we would like in another person. Having the same interests doesn’t necessarily mean that you can get along with a person. For example, if you a person who likes to talk a lot, it doesn’t mean that you could like another person who likes to talk a lot as well. If two people try to keep talking at the same time then obviously, there cannot be any dialogue. So also, if you are the silent reserved type and the other person too is the silent reserved type, the there will hardly be any dialogue at all! The word over here is “compatible.” The interests of partners should complement each other and not clash. Keyword Searches So now that you have decided what is it that interests you in a person and what your interests and tastes are, try such key word searches on a search engine like Google. The idea over here is not to advertise yourself as a person who is in search of a life partner. No matter how well you put it, it looses that touch of subtlety once you are in a singles’ chat room. So don’t do it that way. You remember how we spoke about working backwards; this is how it is done. We will tell you how to project yourself best in a later chapter but for now let us talk about finding Mr. Right or Ms. Right. An interesting thing to be noted here is that it is not difficult to fall in love with a person or to make a choice. The difficult part is to make the right choice and to fall in love with the right person. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com Likes Versus Dislikes The second thing that you could do is chalk out a list of qualities that you genuinely dislike in a person. Yes I am not joking! Dislikes are just as important, or even more important than likes. We all have to make compromises here and there, but if we start away by condoning things, which we genuinely dislike, it is going to tell on the relationship at sometime or the other. I would like to give a word of caution over here. A lot of people make a mistake when they are courting. They put up their best behavior, which is very good of course, but they try to be very adjusting and accommodating which is NOT very good. A point that they tend to over look is that they are not going to be going on a camping trip with this person that they are trying to impress; they are going to be living the rest of their lives with the person. So it is best not to be very “oh so very accommodating and adjusting.” You can afford to stick to things that you are very particular about. And if you have any thoughts that you will be able to mold the person out of his or her offending habits at a later date, forget it. The moment you start trying to mold or cajole the person out of his or her habits, whatever they may be, the word becomes ‘nagging’ and if at all the person does drop the habit, he or she will love you less for it. It really doesn’t work that way. So it’s best to have a clear idea about qualities and habits that you genuinely dislike in a person and steer clear of the ‘lesser mortals’ who have those habits. Once you have a fairly clear idea about your likes and dislikes you are in a better position to make the right choice. And considering the multitude of people out there, you do not have to worry or be over anxious that you just might not find any one at all. He or she is out there, and if you are doing what you are doing right, namely barking up the right tree you will succeed. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com There are some people who even believe that every thing is ordained. It has been written down who should marry who and in the end only that which should happen will happen. Well, I don’t know about that, but I do know that dating helps speed up the process. Another thing that you could do is that you could just let nature take its course. Oh nature has its wonderful ways. There is a lot of chemistry involved in the selection of partner so maybe the best thing we could do is lend nature a helping hand. Friends First Try to look at this endeavor not as a prospective husband/wife hunt but as an effort to make a lot of friends, and I mean good friends. Friends that you can laugh aloud with, friends who make you laugh. Not everyone can make us laugh, and when I say laugh, I am not referring to some comedian. We are talking about friends here. It really does pay to have a lot of friends. It makes ones life richer. The best thing about friends is that you can be yourself with them. And they too can be themselves with you. And that means letting it all out. We must remember that apart from being the dutiful husband or wife, your spouse should be your best friend as well. That is one mistake that most couples make. They tend to look upon their friends and their spouses as separate. While it is perfectly ok to have your own friends, your best friend should always be your husband or wife. It should be someone you can share your dreams and fears with, someone who understands, someone who can give your hand a gentle squeeze when things go wrong and someone who can brighten up your darkest day. All this is a very far cry from sex right? That is why we did mention earlier that looks and sex should be the last criteria in the selection of a life partner. The marriage proposal must come as a natural sequence and it should by no means be the first thing that comes out as soon as you warm up to a person. You cannot very well say something like, “Hey, you know what, I think we have the same tastes so let’s get married.” Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com You can say that of course but it would not be in very good taste. So what do you do if you discover that one of the friends that you made and the one who you were keeping your fingers crossed about is already married? Do you have a car? Then the answer is simple, just run over that person’s spouse and remove the unwanted element, right? Wrong! It is just not done. You can still be friends with that person and shift your attention towards another direction. Who knows, you might even find a better person. All you have to do is shuffle your cards and deal them out again. I hope you have got the hang of what we meant by working backwards now? Good. There is another catch involved in this process. There is a chance that one of the friends that you made may have read this book too and maybe the proposal may come from the other end. If it does, then well and good; for it saves you the ritual. Mr. Right and Ms. Wrong But then, what if the person who proposes to you wasn’t really what you had in mind? Well, the choice is yours of course; you can take it or leave it. But there is a point worth considering over here. If we can find someone that we love that is good, but if we find some one who loves us, isn’t that better? But I would also like to add a word over here. Suppose some one does come and propose to you but unfortunately, you are not in the least interested? You have every right to turn the proposal down but please do it gracefully. There is no need to hurt the other person’s ego. This person is obviously a friend of yours, and surely you care deeply for them. However, if you know that you cannot marry this person, a turned-down proposal is better than a divorce. Try to explain your feelings in the gentlest way possible. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com Step 2: Making Yourself Look Like A Million Dollars Nobody is perfect in this world but that does not mean that we cannot try to look our best. There is absolutely nothing wrong in giving nature a helping hand. Work on your image, work on your profile, and work on your appearance. Many people go by the philosophy, “This is me, whether you like it or not it’s your problem. I am not going to change.” Well, nobody is asking you to change, but what are you trying to do? Scare people off? Well, the fact is, such statements are just a manifestation of your own insecurity. We all have a certain degree of insecurity, some people more than others. It is this insecurity that makes us sound gruff and uncaring when it comes to improving our appearances. Come on, what are you afraid of? I’ll give you a tip. Whatever you are afraid of, others are afraid of the same thing. In this world, most people are neither for us nor against us. They are thinking about themselves. Presenting oneself is an area that requires a lot of work, but surprisingly, this is the one area which people tend to neglect the most. Most of us have a laid back attitude when it comes to painting a picture about ourselves. When it comes to presenting yourself we really have some work to do. If we knew you on a more personal basis we would have loved to help you to chalk out a profile of your self that would be as impressive as possible. But of course, it is impossible to know all our readers on a one to one basis. But you do not have to worry because we have done a lot of study in this regard and once you follow our directions, you can indeed come up with that dream profile. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com The Dream Profile One cannot take too much effort in preparing a profile. It is something that should be viewed in all seriousness. Please do not treat the subject lightly. Imagine that you are preparing for a job; won’t you spend a lot of time getting your resume ready? Well, most of us take up jobs for how long, four or five years? And how about a relationship, definitely we do not embark on a relationship with the expectation that it would last for just a couple of years. We have to understand that a relationship is really worth much more than a job, because it is probably the most important decision in your life. So now let us discuss ways in which you can spruce up your profile. You can of course get a professional to do the job for you since it saves you the effort. You may have to dish out a small amount of course, but it could be worth it. There are many people who have qualms about including a picture in the profile. Well, I don’t want to press the issue. It certainly does look better to have a picture in your profile, but due to privacy issues you can refrain from including a picture. The best thing you could do is once you are comfortable chatting with a person and are convinced that this person does not have any devious intentions, you could send your picture over as an attachment or a file. But this, too, is best done a mutual exchange basis. It would be unfair if you know what the other person looks like but the other person is kept in the dark and vice versa. The Face In The Mirror Now, coming to the picture as such, if you are sending over a picture of yourself, for heavens sake, send over a decent picture. It should be a recent one and please do not make any compromises about the quality. Get a professional to do the job for you and with the digital techniques of today, they can do a very impressive job. Online Dating in 5 Simple Steps www.likeapub.com At the same time do work on your expression before the photograph is taken. Stand in front of your mirror and try out various expressions till you get something that you think is the best for you. And remember that it has to be a picture of you smiling. You should not have the classic hang dog expression, or the “butter-will-not-melt-in-mymouth expression”. Smile, it costs you nothing and it really lights up a person’s face. Now, the first thing that you should do is take out a pencil and paper and write down the raw details about yourself. By raw details we are referring to things like you age, your height and your weight. This is the skeleton of which we are going to work on. And when we have added enough flesh and blood to this backbone, why even you will be impressed by your profile! But first let us steer clear of certain pit falls into which most people fall. The Modesty Pitfall Most of us have been trained to be very modest. When it comes to saying something good about our selves we feel very queasy about blowing our own trumpet. Right, no body is asking you to do any trumpet blowing but facts have to be stated as facts. If you are a music lover and have a good voice too, I can’t see why you can’t put it down like that itself. Why can’t you declare simply without sounding very proud that you have good voice? A pointer that you could bear in mind would be to add something like, “My friends think that I sing rather well”. There now, you can’t feel too bad about something as simple as that. It is as good as saying “Some people think that I sing well, but it is for you to decide whether I have a good voice or not.” Similar statements that you can work on and even add are given below. • “Lots of people appreciate my cooking.” • “I am no Rembrandt, but I enjoy painting.” • “I like decorating, and many of my friends think that my tastes are not too bad.”